NEWSFLASH: Being transparent and using wisdom are two completely different things.
You can be transparent and use wisdom at the same time but here is the kicker: it AIN'T easy.
That's okay though. God never told me that I needed to have all of my crap together. He never told me that by not having my crap together I was wrong.
Actually, here is a conversation we had earlier tonight.
God gave me this revelation a couple nights ago about something and I felt bad because of my behavior before I had the revelation. I would have changed every single thing I did over the past month had I had this revelation back then.
So I apologized to God for not realizing what I've realized now.
Do you know what He said?
"You weren't supposed to."
"Oh...how about that?"
After all, He was the one who gave me the revelation. And He waited to give it me for a reason.
Sometimes the only way to learn is by making mistakes or...not doing things the completely right way. ha ha. Now I know and let me tell you...I'm not letting THAT happen EVER again. Can't say I would have said that if I hadn't lived through this past week the way I did.
I can't tell you how many times I've done the same thing. It's frustrating. You look back and want to kick yourself for what all you've done wrong or even just not perfectly... (speaking as a perfectionist here...)
ReplyDeleteHowever, His timing IS utterly perfect in all ways. He has a reason for allowing us to do the things that we've done. No matter how ridiculous, crazy and wrong they were... It's frustrating, but I can't begin to describe the total peace that passes all understanding that I get from Him in that He's got the complete picture. :) He knows where He's taking us. Even and especially when we can't see a freaking thing to save our lives. :):)
Yaaaaaay God!! :D
Language in general is completely and entirely insufficient to even make a poor attempt to describe anything about Him. :P I try anyway though. ;)
God bless and keep up the good work! :)
T.J.