I can't sleep, so it is time to blog. I still want to go to hot yoga though in the morning. grr...argh.
I'm not going to write the blog that I have ready to write, because that would take too long, and it is late. It is coming though! Actually, it is already written down. I just need to take the time to type it out here.
God is full of so much that is unexpected! I think that is part of the romantic in him. He likes to surprise us with so many things!
Tonight he suddenly says, "My love held you back."
It was a sigh of relief when he said this, because I had been thinking about how I have been feeling like I am at a standstill lately. Surprisingly, I wasn't complaining about it. Usually I'm thinking, I need to be doing something! This time, I feel very happy about it.
It started when I stopped being introspective and suspicious, like I mentioned in my previous blog. What I am now realizing is that a lot of striving melted away with that too. It is so easy to just be a daughter of God, and to live your life like that. He created me, he loves me, he doesn't want to change me. He washed me clean once, and never has to again (except for my feet, John 13). This means I KNOW that I am pure.
I still grow and learn something new everyday. I am still reminded of a lesson that I forgot everyday. This is how it is going to be, and it is a good thing! I love needing Jesus! I love surprise lessons and reminders! I love the fearlessness of just letting go and living!
"My love held you back."
I still don't know exactly what God means by this statement, but I know that it is a blessing. It is an encouragement. It is a good thing. I am being given this time to be here, and I'm not going to push it away.
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