Sunday, February 14, 2010


"Oh that my words were now written! Oh that they were engraved in a book! Oh that they were cut with an iron pen and lead in the rock forever! For I know that my Redeemer is living, and He shall rise on the earth at the last; and even after they corrupt my skin, yet this: In my flesh I shall see God, whom I shall see for myself, and my eyes shall behold, and not a stranger's; though my reins be exhausted in my bosom." Job 19:23-27

And Psalm 91. especially verse 1.

"He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide in the Almighty's shade."

I think it's appropriate to say that it's Monday, time to fight depression! I hate the doom that hovers over Mondays. It's tiresome and old. We need to get over whatever this is and step out on the other side.

God is here with me, on this Monday. God is here, fighting with me, fighting for me. Why can't I always see that? I feel like I'm constantly rediscovering the secret place, because I keep running away from that intimacy with God every time I am vulnerable with Him. Last week, I learned that being completely honest with God is the only way to go. So I told Him everything that was bothering me, including the fact that I was a little mad at Him. I know that God's ways are good and right and perfect but, I am still learning to agree with them.

It took me a few days to come back to Him and have a real talk again. Being so open about my feelings with Him was scary. I always thought that I didn't need to voice my feelings out loud because He already knows what I'm thinking and feeling. But that is not the case. Expressing my feelings, even the wrong ones, brought a new freedom into our relationship. A deeper intimacy that I discovered once I did return. And that is what I meant when I said I'm constantly rediscovering the secret place. I'm so sick of this "return" that I make. When did I ever leave? It's not like I stop believing, but I just stop COMMUNICATING with Jesus. Why am I so ready to hide from the One who understands me and not only accepts me for me, but loves me because I am me! Not in spite of me.

It's the devil. And it's Monday.

Monday! I rename you. You are now My Day. My Day to give to Jesus. Our Day. Our Day to stand tall. Our Day to not only accept the fact that a new week has arrived, but love this new week for what it is. My Week. Our Week.

"Deep calls to deep through the voice of Your waterfalls; all Your waves and Your billows have passed over me." Psalm 42:7

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